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“You’re drinking decaf?”

I pause, the cup almost to my lips. “Stop it with your coffee bigotry!”

“Coffee bigotry?”

“You’re engaging in caffism. I reject it.”

“Caffism?”

“It’s prejudice against someone based on their caffeine consumption.”

“But decaf is such a waste!” he declares.

“See? Judgment. Nothing but judgment from you, you caffist.”

“’Caffist’ is easily the weirdest name you’ve called me, Shannon.”

“Only out loud, Declan.”

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